“Grief makes one hour ten.”

The following is an excerpt from Part One:

I stand there pokerfaced, swaying gently in the confines of his ego-crazed domain. He rants about some other foolishness. Finally realizing that I am not going to react to his petty, nutso outburst, he has the door released. He does not curtsy, but I am free to go.

As the days pass, he attempts to devise further ploys to get me to snap: locking me in for yard; letting me out for yard, but not allowing me to associate with anyone; locking me in for chow; locking me in when I have a visitor. That one annoys me, so I research the grievance process. The informal request form, the “recommended method,” is available from any mod officer, theoretically. This standard request slip, preprinted with “I respectfully request,” can be used for any appeal. The signature of a C/O is required. The drawback is that no C/Os are willing to sign it for me.

The next choice is the formal, level one grievance. This is good. You get a Request for Resolution of Grievance form by submitting a standard request form. I finally find a C/O who is willing to sign that one, and submit it to Lt. Handjob. It is returned to me four days later, scribbled in red ink: Why? A Request for Resolution of Grievance form must be submitted within three days of the alleged incident, then allow thirty days for a response. The next phase is the formal, level two appeal to the director. There is no need to bother researching that process. I am resolved that the unwritten, and only truly effective, grievance policy is: do not grieve.